You know those individuals that seem to go on endlessly about themselves? Their lives, their children, their vacations, their jobs, their experiences. And never once do they reciprocate and ask you about yours. Or even allow time for you to get a bit of sharing in.
Or the ones who do ask you about something in your life, only to turn your answer into an opportunity to “share in detail” about something much more important to them – Themselves!
So what is the point of this post?
If you are in sales, then you understand that in order to sell something, you have to be deeply invested in the needs of your customer. That means understanding as much as you can about their problems, their finances, their organizational structure and decision making processes. And the fit of your solutions to those needs and capabilities.
So it is all about them.
If it isn’t at least a little bit about you, then you have a purely transactional relationship. They buy. You sell. That’s it.
To have a more balanced or ”partnered style” relationship, there has to be some WIIFM (what’s in it for me) or value for both sides of the problem/solution paradigm. Without that, the relationship will never last long term, or will it be particularly productive .
Nor will it be one that you are genuinely enthusiastic about. And that will show sooner or later.
It’s not just the money paid on invoice, or the commission check, or quota achievement – it is about the satisfaction of providing a solution and being respected for what you have provided – that sets apart a viable long term relationship from a transactional one.
And then it can become all about “us” – something to nurture, build upon, grow and appreciate.
So if it is truly all about them, then understand what the relationship is, and what it is not. Know that your job satisfaction will be temporary at best.
Remember too – you get to choose where you invest your time and energy and personal “mojo”.
The more “non-transactional” relationships you can develop, the better.